Loss or grief

What is it?

Wellbeing Tools

Loss & grief are complex experiences.
Grieving is a natural response with no ‘right’ way to do it.
Reach out to trusted adults & maintain support networks.
Seeking professional help is a valid & healthy option.

Here's more detail

Published: 26/10/23

Loss and grief are complex emotional experiences that can have an impact on your emotional health. Adolescence is a time when young people are learning to navigate their emotions and identities, and dealing with loss can be particularly challenging. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a pet or a significant life change, grief can trigger a range of emotions, including sadness, anger, confusion and loneliness.

It’s crucial to understand that grieving is a natural and healthy response to loss. There is no ‘right’ way to grieve, and it’s okay to express your feelings in whatever way feels most authentic to you. It can also be helpful to reach out to trusted adults, such as parents, guardians or school counselors, to talk about your feelings and seek support. Grief can be a long and ongoing process, and it’s okay to ask for help when needed.

Photo of a young person speaking with an adult

Additionally, maintaining connections with friends and peer support networks can be beneficial. Often, talking to friends who have experienced loss can provide a sense of understanding and comfort. Remember that it’s okay to take your time in healing, and seeking professional help from therapists or grief counselors is a valid and healthy option if you find it difficult to cope with your grief on your own.

Learn more
The Mental Health Foundation explains that when we are bereaved, we can feel anxious, sad, angry, shocked, grief-stricken, withdrawn, in disbelief, guilty, sad and in denial – and experience these in no particular order. We can struggle with sleep, concentration, our appetite and making decisions. We can also experience physical pain, such as headaches and muscle pain, as well as less specific bodily reactions that are similar to feelings of anxiety.
Suggestions that might help with difficult feelings around loss and bereavement:
Allow yourself space to be with the feelings you are experiencing
There is no time limit to grief
Take care of your mind and body
Sometimes giving to others or an act of kindness can help you feel better
Do something that makes you feel good
Be patient with others around you who may also be struggling with loss but express it differently
If your feelings become overwhelming, seek support
To learn more about loss, bereavement and mental health, visit the links below.
Guidance: Change, loss and bereavement
Guidance: Dealing with grief and loss
Blog: How I started talking about my grief
Blog: What I wish I’d known about dealing with loss at Christmas

Grief isn't a cut-and-dry 'thing' you can put in a box. Often, it's messy.

Ryan

During the Christmas holidays there is often an unspoken pressure on everyone to come across as cheerful. Please know that you do not have to pretend that you’re okay just for the comfort of others.

Louisa, 17

When my best friend passed away, I barely remember the first few months after he died. I was weighed down by this cloud of absolute nothing. For me, that was one of the things I never knew about grief. It can be so many emotions - or it can be nothing at all.

Ryan

Take your time, there is no length of time you have to grieve. You are ready when you feel ready. You grief is valid, just breathe and think about the memories you shared. The pain may be excruciating now, but each day is going to be less painful.

Charlotte, 24

Grief doesn’t have a timeline. Just take one step at a time. There isn’t a guidebook on how to grieve and what emotions to feel. You may feel many emotions, you may feel a few emotions or you may feel none at all. If you feel a whirlwind of emotions it’s completely natural.

Erin, 16